Monday, April 5, 2010

Jesus paid it all, all to Him I owe ....

...sin had made a crimson stain, He washed it white as snow. That beautiful song has been on my heart since Friday. It is one of my favorites because of the truth that it holds. I do not have to worry that I am not the perfect daughter, sister, wife, or soon to be mother. Yes, I strive to be the best person I can be and to honor God; however, I am human and will fall short. God sent His son for me to this Earth as a little baby, knowing full well He would end up dying on the cross for my sins. It doesn't matter how many times I hear it, I still can not fathem it all. God loves us that much. That much is so much more than we can ever give or receive here on Earth. I love the service brother Bill preached yesterday. I am so thankful that we have a leader that does not preach just the "fluff" of Christianity, but also the side that many preachers these days avoid. Yesterday he reminded us of Christ's brutal cruxifixion that was spoke of in Isaiah 53. Not a pretty scripture, but so much truth in that even then it was known that Jesus would not be esteemed. As a Christian, though, it is our job to value Him number one in our life. I have been praying about this over the last few months. Before I got married, I worked hard at making God my priority. I prayed for months before our vows that I would not put my husband before Him because I knew how easily that could happen. Since February, I have found myself preparing and praying that I wouldn't put this child before God either. I can see how easily that can happen. Thank you Bill for preaching something that all of us needed to hear.
This Easter weekend I found myself missing lost family members as I usually do around the holidays. Easter it really hits home for me, though, because the year we lost Steve was right before Easter. Easter has always been my favorite time to get together. All the fellowship and outside fun in the beautiful weather brightens my spirits, and of course the reason we celebrate
even more so. Easter 2007 just was not the same. Uncle Steve was a big part of my life. He had the patience that sometimes my dad lacked, but together the two of them were a great pair for teaching us kids how to shoot at cans, fish, water ski, play catch, do fireworks, and of course spoil us every Wednesday night at Larry's Mexican restaurant while mother was at choir practice or Bunco. Elizabeth and I were blessed to grow up living very close to our family, and Steve was just such a joy. My last really great memory of him is from our wedding. During big events my dad and Steve usually weren't the center of attention (I am sure in their younger years that is a different story!). I made my dad do the father-daughter dance and I don't think he was too fond of that. Shortly after, Steve came over and gave me a big hug and told me how much as a father he loved that. Even though Dad might not have shown it, Steve said it is probably one of his proudest moments. Mother told me that Steve and Melinda both helped and cleaned up the reception and that she was so thankful for them. Steve was always willing to lend a helping hand or a crying shoulder. Heaven gained a wonderful man when he passed, and how I long to see him again someday.
The next January we lost Grandpa. That was just as tough, no matter how "prepared" we were. Easter was grandpa's favorite holidday, too. I could tell in his eyes how much he cherished each of us coming over after church in our Easter dresses that they bought us. They hid eggs everywhere for us and he got a kick out of us trying so hard to find them. He loved his children very much, but he really had a lot of pride and joy for his grandchildren. I loved hearing his stories of how he grew up on a farm and now living on a farm, I relish those stories. He loved CR very much and was so happy when we got married. CR even asked for his permission before he proposed. I am sure that made him feel just as special as he made us feel. He lived a wonderful and full life; we just miss him and I can not wait to sit on his lap again for story time.
We had to stay home this Easter, so I was of course a little homesick. When I heard that it was just going to be us and Granny and Dat's it made it harder ... part of Easter for me is having too many people in one house and too much food to cover the table. As sad as I was, yesterday was such a blessing. Granny and Dat enjoyed all of my Easter tradition that I brought to their table and sitting to hear their stories is just as refreshing as hearing them from my grandparents. It was low key, but that is sometimes just what we need - to bring us back to our truth and roots. Easter isn't about the people and the food or egg hunts - it is about Jesus not being in the borrowed tomb just like He promised. And if he kept that promise, how reassuring it is to know and believe that He keeps all of His promises.

Dixie is the dog that CR is "just training". She is a black lab and tons of fun. She thinks she can play fetch with Koda, but everytime she gets whooped.

Proud Koda!

1 comment:

Roberta said...

Thank you Lauren for sharing and bringing back some memories. God has blessed you with putting everything in a wonderful story. Soon you will be writing stories of baby Patrick and once again will make me cry, but all joyful.Happy week.momma